In a comment on last month’s Dissecting the Male Sex Drive post, one of you said some women experience a need for release one or two days per month due to the hormones associated with ovulation. She also pointed out the reality of “‘ovulation sex’ even in an otherwise dry marriage.”
A valid point. We have heard this from plenty of women, and I have heard from a number of men who say they are guaranteed sex once a month, no matter what, because on that day she will not be denied. Such is the power of our hormones; and it should never be ignored.
I suggested in my reply to the comment women could understand what men deal by imagining feeling such a level of desire every day since their thirteenth birthday. If you find that a scary thought, you are getting the picture.
I have often told men it is wise and loving to understand their wife’s hormones, and what those hormones do to her body, mind, and emotions. While hormones never excuse sin, they can and do have a powerful effect. Your husband can make it easier or more difficult for you.
His hormones also have a powerful effect on his body, mind, and emotions. In addition to a much stronger sex drive, he is more aggressive, driven, and confrontational. Being competitive, driving fast, and feeling threatened when another man talks to you are all fuelled by the hormones God gave him. As with you, his hormones never excuse sin, but they do have a powerful effect on him. You can make this easier or more difficult for him. Maybe thinking of some of what he does as the equivalent of you dealing with PMS will give you a bit of compassion for his struggles.
~ Paul – I’m XY and my hormones made me do it!