At 53, I have not yet had a midlife crisis. This means ether I am going to live a very long time, or I just skipped it. I’m guessing the latter, and hoping it’s both!
A mid-life crisis is usually a result of realising your life is half over, and you have not done what you wanted to do, or feeling what you have done is not enough. Some want to “leave a legacy” and start to worry if they have time to do so. Others feel they are getting too old for some of the adventures they have been putting off for years. The classic image of a man having a mid-life crisis is buying a red sports car and getting a girlfriend barely older than his daughter. Many men do far smaller things, while others just get depressed and give up.
If you husband is in the midst of a mid-life crisis, be understanding, don’t condone sin, and hang on for a rough ride. He is not thinking rationally at this point, and expecting him to listen to reason is going to end in frustration. What’s more, he may blame you (because who wants to blame themselves), making you the last person he wants to hear from. A trusted male friend has the best chance to get him to think clearly.
If your husband is nearing 40, you might be able to do some midlife crisis prevention. Talk with him about his life – what he likes about it, what he does not like, and what he feels is missing. Encourage him in what he wants to do, even if it will cost both of you. Help him make some good choices now so he will not be tempted to do something rash in the future.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I have scheduled my midlife crisis for my 100th birthday.