We recently did a survey asking men and women their idea of perfect foreplay. While it was not a choice we gave, five men added they would like to watch their wife masturbate. This does not surprise me; had it been a choice, I have no doubt it would have been selected by a number of men. I’ve had plenty of men ask me how they can get their wife to do this, and several women upset or confused their husband asked for this. Most men (virtually all?) would like this. Many women wonder why, or have negative feelings about it.
There are a number of reasons a husband would want this:
- Curiosity: Most men have wondered how women do this since becoming aware women do it.
- Education: Most of us never feel we really understand female sexuality and sex organs. Foreplay and manual orgasm often leave us feeling like we’re guessing. Watching how you do it seems like a great way of learning how to do it better.
- It Proves You’re Sexual: I’m sure it seems odd to women, but this reassures a man his wife is sexual. It shows she really wants and enjoys sex, which is a good thing.
- It’s Deeply Intimate: I realise masturbation may seem the opposite of intimate to you, but he sees it as a personal and private sex act. Sharing this with him is letting him into a special, private place.
- A Big Turn-On: All of the rest aside, yes, it’s a massive turn on for a guy.
Does your husband want to watch you masturbate? Odds are very, very high he does. Maybe he’s asked or hinted, maybe he’s been too afraid of what you would say or think to suggest it. You could ask him, but I wouldn’t do so unless you are willing to follow up if he says yes. I’d also suggest not just doing it unless you know he not opposed. If he’s strongly against masturbation, he may get upset. Even worse, he might get both aroused and upset.
Survey Says: We’re running a survey on this issue. So far, over 400 men have answered. Half of the men have watched their wife masturbate at least once (with or without orgasm). Fewer than 5% have no desire to do so or do so again.
~ Paul – I’m XY and I ain’t sayin’ no more!