This year lovely Lori and I have lost almost 70 pounds between us. (I’ve lost more, gender differences in metabolism are so unfair to you ladies!)
We’ve not lost weight by going on “a diet”; we’ve done it by making a lifestyle change. How we eat now is how we will be eating a month from now, a year from now, and likely for the rest of our lives. From what I’ve read, this is the only way to lose substantial weight and keep it off.
I mention this because I’ve had a bad habit of trying to change my marriage with “diets” rather than life style changes, and I see plenty of men doing the same thing. Men are into fast change. Attack a problem and solve it before sunset. If it’s a really big, complex problem, it might take the rest of the week. Once it’s solved, we move on to the next problem.
This approach works for some things, but its success rate for marriage issues is abysmal. Marriage changes take time and ongoing effort; a fast fix is rarely a real fix. Unfortunately, this reality doesn’t always occur to us, so we keep doing what feels natural even though it doesn’t work.
If your husband is into “fad diet” fixes for your marriage, try to help him see it’s not working. It’s going to take lifestyle changes, which may not be comfortable for him. If you understand the why, you will be better able to change the what.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’m less of a man than I used to be!
Our weight lost life style change:
- After way too much research, we’re eating what looks a lot like the Mediterranean diet.
- The real secret to our weight loss is smoothies. I do one for breakfast and lunch, while Lori the lessening does oatmeal for breakfast and a smoothie for lunch. Smoothies make it easy to get the fibre, fruit, and veggies (spinach powder) we need in a low calorie, filling meal. (Did you know cocoa powder is low calorie and rather healthy?)
- We splurge a bit weekly. For us this is family night with our son and his in-laws. They’re rather nuts and twigs in their diet, so eating a bit more isn’t a huge hit. This is usually the only day we eat dessert.
- Each night we each have one square of Ghirardelli Intense Dark Bar Sea Salt Soiree Chocolate Bar. At 63 calories, it’s not a problem, and we get a treat.
- We’ve also been moving more as we worked on the house and RV. We are planning to do some hiking and other things when we hit the road to keep the calorie burning up.