We regularly run into couples where one has no desire for drama while the other seems to feed on it.
I have a theory on this. Craving and creating drama is like having allergies. According to the “hygiene hypothesis”, exposure to plenty of bacteria and viruses keeps the immune system busy. In our modern less germy world, allergies are the result of our immune system not having enough to do.
For all the stress of our modern world, we don’t have many real life and death worries. Certainly, nothing like people faced through most of history. I think we have a part of the brain devoted to dealing with life threatening crisis, and when we lack real crisis we make things up.
I’ve seen some folks who are clearly creating one drama after another. I’m sure these folks would deny they’re doing it, and it’s likely they are doing it unconsciously. Regardless of why they do it or if they know they do it, some people are all about drama and crisis, and they’ll go to great measures to have it.
Most men have no stomach for this, and the older a man gets the less he’s willing to put up with drama. Ongoing drama is a sure way to get a man to withdraw and ignore the source of the drama.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and doing marriage ministry gives us all the drama we can handle!