Get Drunk With Sex!

October 2, 2015

in Uncategorized

Just in case you’ve not been paying attention, my sexy wife and I are very pro-sex – provided it’s in marriage. Don’t do anything before marriage, then go at it like crazy!

Pro sex church sign © Stewart Church Signs

Sadly, this is a controversial position in parts of the church. The thinking is sex is okay, or even good, but we should exercise restraint and self-control. If we enjoy it too much we can fall into sin. All things in moderation, especially sex!

This has the sound of holiness, but it’s actually in direct contradiction with what God says about sex. 

[Proverbs 5:15-19 ESV]

Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress? [Proverbs 5:15-20 ESV]

If we understand the euphemisms, this passage is all about sex. Water sources were common euphemisms for sex organs. A cistern or well for the female, a spring, stream, or fountain for the male. So in this passage men are told to drink freely of sex with their wife while avoiding other women. They’re told to always delight in her breasts, and to be intoxicated with her sexual loving.

In Song of Songs 5:1 God tells the lovers to consummate their marriage, and to become intoxicated with love. In SS 1:2 the woman says “Kiss me, make me drunk with your kisses!”

Intoxicated. Drunk. Without restraint. No holding back. This is how God calls us to have sex with our spouses.

This post is a call to throw out self-restraint and enter into the wild sex God meant you to enjoy. Do it for yourself and for your husband. Then find ways to encourage others to do the same.

Along these lines, I will be doing posts on sex all next week.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and my wife has got it going on!

* Ariel Bloch and Chana Bloch, The Song of Songs: A New Translation (Berkeley, CA: University of California, 1995).

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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

MrShorty October 4, 2015 at 12:04 pm

This is something that has been kind of rattling around in my head for the last couple of weeks or so. I have been thinking about some statements that suggest that “too much sex is bad for marriage”. They are usually given in the context of courtship and newlyweds, who, still in the “infatuation” stage, may enter marriage with too much emphasis on the sexual relationship (especially if they have truly saved themselves for marriage). I guess my thought process has contrasted this “too much sex is bad” message with examples of sexless marriages and wondered if there really is such a thing as “too much”. I’m sure that, somewhere in the broad range of human experience, there have been marriages that could not last because the couple really did put too much emphasis on sex. But, when I read through blogs like this, and the marriage help section of the bookstore or library, I do not see very much written warning about the dangers of too much. What I do see is a great deal written about “keeping passion alive” or “how to negotiate sexual differences” or “how to rekindle the flame”. While I’m sure it is possible to overemphasize sex in marriage, it really seems that the greater danger is in underemphasizing it.


Paul Byerly October 4, 2015 at 5:14 pm

@MrShorty – If one spouse uses sex to avoid dealing with things that need to be addressed, it’s a problem. But they could just as well use drugs, football, or facebook to avoid things, and the result is the same. The problem is now the thing used to avoid, it’s the avoiding.
Besides, sex is rather self limiting. While a woman can theoretically go all day, men can’t. Even young men are limited in how often they can do it, especially day in, day out.
Paul Byerly recently posted…Small Bits of ScriptureMy Profile


Charlie O October 7, 2015 at 5:06 am

I read the Bible through every so-many months, and have for decades. So, I’m somewhat conversant with it. Nowhere does it warn of too much. It does, however, warn of too little in I Cor. 7. As you mention, Paul, God has pretty much made it self-regulating. If men could do it as often as women can, then we would have a definite problem.


Paul Byerly October 7, 2015 at 12:38 pm

@Charlie O – It warns a bout “too little” and encourages not holding back. And yet there are those who think self-control is necessary, even in marriage. Of course the Gnostics felt the same way, and Paul said some very rude things about those folks!
Paul Byerly recently posted…Introvert VacationMy Profile


J. Parker October 7, 2015 at 3:03 pm

This was such a great epiphany for me when I did a Hebrew word study of Song of Songs 5:1. It’s so clear that God’s saying to actually go overboard with sexual intimacy in your marriage. What an amazingly generous Father we have!
J. Parker recently posted…Q&A with J: Baby’s Here, But Sex? Not So Much.My Profile


Coriander October 18, 2015 at 8:49 pm

This reminds me of that Baudelaire poem about always being drunken – with wine, poetry or virtue.

It is interesting to me to observe how religious people talk about sex within marriage. I know that I have the greatest natural sympathy to the point of view you express in this post.


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