I know lingerie is a battle issue for many couples. I understand some of the issues women have with it, or how they think their husband feels about it. Let me try to help you understand how men think about sexy undies.
The best way for me to explain it is lingerie is gift wrap. You, or more specifically your sexuality, is the gift. Bits of cloth and lace are not the gift, they are the wrapping paper around the gift. A great wrapping job with high-quality material does nothing to improve a poor gift, and lingerie is not his attempt to hide some part of your body. Gift wrap calls attention to the gift. It also shows the person giving the gift cares enough to take extra time and effort in how the gift is presented.
When a man’s wife wears something sexy she tells him she feels good about her sexuality and about offering to share her sexuality with him. This is the primary reason men want their wives to wear the stuff. It’s an offer, a tease, a promise. It says, “I turn you on, and I know it.“
Some of you think you don’t turn your husband on. While I’ve talked to men who say this about their wife, it’s amazingly rare. What’s more, when a man does say it, odds are his wife is better looking than most. If a man isn’t turned on by the sight of his wife naked or near naked it usually has far more to do with his messed up thinking than her body!
If your husband would like you in sexy undies, a few practical Christmas suggestions:
- If he buys you lingerie, understand he’s asking you to share your sexuality with him. Look past the item – how impractical, uncomfortable or “not you” it is – and see his heart and his desire. Say thank you like you mean it.
- If he has a bad track record with lingerie give him some suggestions. Among other things help him understand the difference between day wear and play wear – the latter being put on to be taken off shortly.
- Buy something you like for yourself. Wrap it, and give it to him as a gift. He’ll understand, trust me.
- Send him to my Buying Lingerie Without Dying of Embarrassment article.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and wrapping paper looks best on the floor!
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