Most men enjoy being sexually teased, as long as you know when to move from teasing to pleasing. Some women enjoy teasing too, but many don’t and those women are unlikely to provide the sexual teasing their man would like.

Sexual teasing falls into two categories. The first is arousal teasing; the second is stimulation teasing. Every man has a limit for each of these. Usually, if his limit for one is high or low, the other is about the same, but there are exceptions. The reason men like to be teased sexually is it makes sex bigger and better. Arousing him in bits and pieces all day long makes sex an all day thing, and it builds him up for a much better climax. Prolonged stimulation also makes sex last longer, and can make is much better for him.

Arousal Teasing:

• Visual teasing is the obvious form of arousal teasing. This could be a quick flash, an extra button or two undone, or spending the evening nude or nearly nude. Removing one item of clothing at a time over an hour or more is a great way to go. You can also use mystery here. Wear a short skirt and sit so he can almost see if you have anything on under the skirt. Then tease him repeatedly before showing him enough to confirm what he hopes. Additionally, any touching of your sexual parts will get him going, be it through, under, or without clothing.  
• Your words can drive him crazy. Tell him what you’re going to do to him later in the day. Be explicit. Later tell him you’ve changed your mind, and instead, you are going to do something else – which you also explain in detail. You can also send texts telling him what’s going to happen later, or what you are or are not wearing. 
• Touching him sexually is arousal teasing, bleeding into stimulation teasing if you take it far enough. Having him touch you is another way to do this.

Stimulation Teasing:

This is doing things you would usually do to get him to orgasm but stopping before climax. You can take him to the brink of climax, just close enough to make him think you might finish him, or stop before he’s too far along. You can do it a few times or many.

Most men enjoy being repeatedly taken to the edge of orgasm without finishing. In addition to making their climax far better when you finally give it to them, being that close is almost as pleasurable as orgasm. This is as near as most men will ever get to multiple orgasms.

If you want to take him very close, manual sex is the best option. You have the control; he can’t finish himself with a quick thrust. Additionally, you can watch him better. His body will tell you how close he is to climax. His face, his breathing, and the way he holds or moves his legs all telegraph his level of arousal. His penis and testicles are especially good for this. At high levels of arousal, his testicles will pull up very close to his body. When he’s very close, the head of his penis will change colour and texture. With practice, you will know exactly where he is and how much more you can do without taking him over the top.

One thing you may have to learn is to know when “Don’t stop” means don’t stop and when it does not. He may beg you to finish him when he really wants you to tease him a bit longer. Test this by stopping one more time when he asks to finish, and then after he regains his mind, ask him if he’s glad you stopped or wishes you had kept going.

A Few Things to Know:

• If you keep him on the edge a long time before he climaxes, he may lose his erection far more slowly than usual after orgasm. If you want to use that for your pleasure, give him half a minute so he doesn’t get overstimulated.
• If you handle his penis a lot more than usual, he may be sore the next day. Odds are he will think it was more than worth it. Keeping him lubricated will reduce the problem. Prolonged arousal can also result in some puffy swelling. This is harmless and will go away on its own.
• Very long times of high arousal without release can cause problems and, in some cases, may lead to significant pain. Ejaculating will take care of this, leaving nothing but a dull ache which goes away with time. If you’ve never teased him before, start easy and build up. Find his comfort level both mentally and physically. 
• Long-term teasing can result in a lot of pre-ejaculatory fluid even in men who don’t normally produce much of it. This fluid is clear, thin, and slippery. Unless he has climaxed recently, it doesn’t contain sperm.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I encourage you to show your husband a good time!

This week’s TMB survey asks about your use or non-use of sexual slang.  

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