When We Understand
A couple of days ago I was talking with Lori the Lovely as I was making our lunch smoothies (chocolate strawberry/raspberry with spinach, banana, and Greek yogurt). She suddenly shushed me, jumped up, and made a note on her computer. (In an RV everything is next to everything else!)
She apologised as she sat down, but there was no need. Our discussion had sparked an idea for a Generous Wife post, and she wanted to get it down before she lost it. I get it because I blog too. Coming up with ideas is often the hardest part of the job, and when you have an idea everything stops till you have it on paper (or the computer).
If I didn’t blog, I might be miffed at her stopping me in mid-sentence to write down her thoughts. I could focus on how often she does it and build up resentment. Our shared experience means we both understand and it eliminates any possible frustration.
I suspect this is a common issue for couples in places where only one does something. The other doesn’t understand the mental and emotional challenges of whatever. They don’t “get it”, they misunderstand, and they judge their spouse’s actions based on their own reality.
If you’re on the receiving end of this anywhere in your marriage, explaining your reality might help. If you think you might be doing this to your hubby, ask him to explain his reality. Believe him the way you want him to believe you.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I enjoy my little reality very much.
A couple great blog posts I’ve seen recently:
Q&A: His Past Porn Habit Makes It Hard to Know What’s Okay | Hot, Holy & Humorous
Are Friends Destroying Sex in Your Marriage? | Intimacy in Marriage