Silence Feels Safer
I was a bit nervous about my Rejecting What We “Don’t Deserve” post. I knew what I wanted to say, but I was unsure I could say it so women would hear it right. Based on the comments I managed.
This makes me think of something some husbands deal with all the time. Their wife doesn’t always hear what they mean when they share their thoughts and feelings. In fact, some would say she never hears what they mean. They know there’s a gender translation issue, but they feel unable to bridge the gap. I’ve heard men express frustration, confusion, and anger over this issue. Some have no idea how their words will be heard until they get their wife’s response, and some feel it’s a moving target.
More than a few husbands decide the safest bet is to say as little as possible. If opening his mouth gets him grief, silence is safer. If his attempts to share his feelings could end with his wife angry about something he doesn’t think and doesn’t think he said, saying nothing seems like the wiser choice.
I don’t mean to suggest this is the only reason men fail to communicate with their wives, but it’s a very real reason for many and a major factor for some.
~ Paul – I’m XY, but I speak broken XX.