Poke Means I Love You

When our son was a teenager he would walk by Lori or me and poke us. It was his way of saying he loved us. We took to poking him, and each other, and it became a bit of a game.

Poke Means I Love You

Some men are far more comfortable expressing their feelings with actions than with words. So a poke, bump, or other unneeded physical contact may be his way of telling you he loves you.

As for the other poking men do, that’s saying I love you and I want you!

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I poke my wife while we are standing at our desks.

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6 Comments on “Poke Means I Love You

  1. “If a boy hits you on the playground, it means he likes you.”

    Women probably don’t like aggressive touch from their husbands because it harkens back to that playground “abuse.” Uncomfortable, forward, aggressive, unwanted touch does not equal loving. I bought into that lie and went on to be a girlfriend to a louse of a boy.

    NEVERTHELESS, it is a stereotype with some truth to it, albeit immature. I would say that immature aggression carries over in pushy bar guys trying to pick up a girl. Whereas a gentleman meets her on her level in a loving way.

    So discerning wives can see if hubby is being inner-child playful. A good way to tell is if the playground poking is interspersed with loving touches and caresses, or if he only comes after you in aggressive manners.

    I’m LIBL, I’m XX, and I love being playful with hubby so long as it is shrouded in loving gestures, too.

    • Where I went to grammar school, merely failing to be courteous to a girl was met with severe negative peer pressure – and if witness by a teacher, a stern lecture from the Head. I don’t know what punishment striking a girl might have engendered. I would never have thought of doing that.

      We were trained to be gentlemen, and I’ve since learned that many women in today’s world find the mannerisms developed to be coldly formal. Formal they may (and I think, should) be, but cold they are not.
      Andrew Budek-Schmeisser recently posted…Your Dying Spouse 286 – Songs For My FuneralMy Profile

  2. Oh boy, do I ever relate to this post! My close friends and I do this all the time. Although my reason for doing this is pretty much the exact opposite of the reason Paul gives for why some men do it. It’s not that I’m deeply uncomfortable expressing my feelings with words (in fact I would prefer it, given a choice). Rather, it’s because I’m NOT comfortable expressing my feelings in a more physical manner. I’m moderately touch averse (don’t care for hugs, barely tolerate handshakes), so a light poke (with fingers, please, not the “other poking”) is a very controlled and limited amount of physical contact I can handle while still being just enough to give and/or receive affection. My friends know this about me and respect my boundaries, which I appreciate more than I can say.

    But I thought I was the ONLY person who does this. I didn’t realise this is something OTHER people do too, outside of my small group of friends. That’s . . . kind of a major eye-opener, honestly. Makes me feel a lot more normal than I did before. I really wasn’t expecting to come here the other day and read this post and relate to it as much as I do. Thanks for this, Paul. Good post!

      • Aw, good story. Hugs are just a lot more meaningful coming from someone like that, aren’t they? I’m kinda like that too. Personally don’t enjoy being hugged, but I don’t mind giving hugs on very rare occasions to my friends if they’re in distress and seem to need one (but not without asking first). Doesn’t do anything for me, but does do something for them, something good, that seems to help and make them feel better. So I don’t begrudge it.

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