Do You Want Your Son to Marry a Woman Like You?

If you have a son you no doubt love him – even when he’s driving you crazy or scaring you silly. And I’m sure you want the best for him when he grows up.

With that in mind, how would you feel if he married a woman who treated him the way you treat your husband? 

It’s easy to excuse or downplay our less than loving treatment of our spouse by telling ourselves they bring it on themselves. Humans are masters of justification and excusing ourselves. This is why my question is so important – it cuts through all the justification and asks if the behaviour is good or bad, right or wrong, loving or unloving.

If you’re treating your husband in ways you wouldn’t want your future daughter-in-law to treat your son you have two problems. Aside from doing your man wrong, you’re teaching your son that such behaviour is normal and acceptable. This increases the odds he will marry a woman who does not love him as she should.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’ve already asked the men if they want their daughter to marry a man such as them.

Links may be monetised
Image Credit: © |

Shop Amazon ♦ Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
Where we’re going Contact us about speaking

6 Comments on “Do You Want Your Son to Marry a Woman Like You?

  1. When I ask my young sons what kind of wife they want, they throw their arms around me and say, “you, mommy!” <3

  2. That’s a good way to evaluate one’s self as a spouse. If my stepdaughter had chosen a man more like her dad, she would have had a happier and more secure life (I tell my husband that all the time – he’s kind, gentle, a good Christian). I think I spoil my husband and that wouldn’t be good for a young man on his first marriage. But I married an older widower and I love spoiling him (and he loves being spoiled).

    • … that wouldn’t be good for a young man on his first marriage.

      How many marriages should a man have?

  3. Yes and no. As far as being productive, intelligent, willing to care for him, someone who loves children and would love to stay home with them if possible, a woman who likes to cook for him, who loves him and doesn’t say no to intimacy if he asks, a believer who wants to instill those values in their children – yes.
    As far as the rest, no way! I’d prefer they all marry someone they think is beautiful, and who is emotionally healthy enough to believe it. I want them to find someone with confidence (but not conceited). I don’t want them to settle for someone, but to wait for the right woman. Most of all, I want them to find wives they can actually love deeply, and wives that are able to accept that love.
    Sorry if this isn’t making sense. It makes sense in my head but not so much when I write it.

  4. I’m not a parent, so can’t evaluate this from that perspective. But I like the question, precisely because it does cut through the justification. And the answer is, if I had a son, I’d say most of the time I’d want him to marry a woman like me…or at least, like I am now. Certainly wouldn’t want a son of mine to marry a woman like I was in my twenties!! But maybe that’s the advantage to my not having married till I was older. I shudder to think how I’d have treated a husband those years ago if I’d had one, because I was in such an unhealthy place mentally and emotionally. And even though I’m not a parent, it’s still a good question for me to ask myself from a hypothetical standpoint, to cut through my own excuses when I do make them.

  5. Perhaps a more telling answer is would your husband want his boys to marry a woman like you.

    Even if you would, it might be a good idea to get another opinion. You just might be a bit biased ;)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge

%d bloggers like this: