My dear wife Lori has fewer pet peeves than I do. One of her more rabid peeves is telling someone what they think.

• “You think I’m stupid.”
• “You want me to ______.”
• “You said ____. So that means you think _____.”
• “You must think _____.”

Even if the statement is 100% true, it’s rude. When less than totally true, such statements hurt communication. Asking “Do you think _____?” Is a bit better, but checking an assumption is still not as good as just asking what your husband thinks.

BTW, I know this can be difficult for some of you because your hubby doesn’t volunteer what he thinks and may not answer when asked. Making guesses in such a situation is natural, but it’s still rude and it still hurts communication. 

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I tell my wife what I think about everything!

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