What If It’s Really Just Selfishness?

Lori and I have learned in both our own marriage in with those we try to help to look behind the surface explanations, reasons, and excuses. All too often when we peel back the surface what we find underneath is selfishness.

One place this is harder to see is when we apply labels to ourselves. Things like introvert/extrovert, talkative/reserved, and low/high sex drive, for example.

I’m not saying these labels are lies, and I’m not saying they don’t matter. But when we use these as an excuse to deny our spouse something we should give them we are using the label as a way to cover our selfishness. The same is true when we use the label to try to demand more of something from our spouse than is reasonable.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and discovering I’m being selfish!

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