It Works… For Awhile
I see couples doing all manner of wrong things to each other in their marriages – stonewalling, yelling, manipulating, and so on. No one would say these are a kind or loving way to treat a spouse, and yet they happen in many marriages. Why?
They happen because they work. Do these wrong things long enough and you will probably get what you want – or at the very least you can get out of something you don’t want to do. It’s not right, but it works, which makes it tempting. It’s especially tempting when we’re tired or stressed.
There are several problems with doing these things. Aside from the issues of sin and being unloving, these tactics don’t work forever. Sooner or later the other person gets tired of it and does something about it. This could be withdrawing emotionally, looking for emotional support elsewhere, or walking away “without warning”.
Take the long term approach to your marriage and avoid things that get you what you want at the cost of your relationship.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I only manipulate my wife with my hands!