The Sexuality He’s Not Showing You

Do you think you know your husband’s true sexuality? Has he told you what he desires and enjoys and expressed himself fully? Odds are he has not. In last Friday’s Sexual Urgency: Gotta Have it RIGHT NOW! post a couple of men touched on this in the comments:

“Do I have these moments when I desperately feel I must have my wife? Yes. However, my training and conditioning is “conceal, don’t feel” and never to act on these feelings or even express them to my wife.”

“I’ve been trained over the years to suppress this feeling.”

The first man was “trained” by his family and church before he met his wife, while the second was trained by circumstances in his marriage. But neither is showing their wife their true sexuality.

The Sexuality He's Not Showing You

Let me share a personal example as a way of looking at what can be behind holding back. Many years ago for my birthday, Lori gave me a tube of cake decorating frosting and a card that made it clear it was for me to decorate and enjoy her… ah… cupcakes.

That tube of frosting sat in the night table drawer for a long time. I think it got thrown out during a move. I never used it, and it would have been natural for Lori to think it was an idea that didn’t appeal to me. In truth, it did appeal to me, a great deal. But I had all kinds of fears about it. Did I want to do it “too much” (whatever that means)? Would Lori feel uncomfortable if I did it – either because of her or how I went about it? Would I expose something I needed to keep hidden or something that would hurt her or put her off sex? As much as I enjoyed the offer, and as much as I wanted to try it, my various fears kept me from doing it.

I know very few men who feel free to be themselves with their wife in bed. Part of that may be her doing, but most comes from long before he met her. A man is super sensitive about this, so he tends to read into what his wife says and does the negative response he expects. A lot of men have tried opening up a couple of times only to feel rejected. I suspect the rejection is often in the man’s mind. Sometimes we push the limits at really horrible times (she is stressed, tired, cramping) because we secretly want to confirm our fears.

If you hit your husband cold with this it’s unlikely he will expose himself. However, if you understand this is likely you can be on the look out for him putting his toe in to test the water. If you see him doing that, do your best to accommodate him. If you can’t, be sure you tell him you’re too tired (or whatever) to do it well, but you want a rain check. Then follow up.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I love my wife’s cupcakes! 

Related Post (Available in 24 hours)Separating Your Real Sexuality From Porn | The Generous Husband

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48 Comments on “The Sexuality He’s Not Showing You

  1. Women really don’t see this. For us men, our identity is tied into sexuality. If sex is not appealing, then we are not appealing. We seem often to be items on a to-do list. That’s why passion matters so much to us. We don’t want sex to be just a duty. We want it that our women consider it a privilege that they get to enjoy sex with us. The message no tells us is that we’re not appealing and when you’re caught up in something else, like a TV show for instance, the whole idea is “What I am doing now is more appealing to me than intimate time with you.”
    Nick Peters recently posted…Deeper Water Podcast 7/15/2017: Hugh RossMy Profile

    • I totally agree, Nick, I feel exactly the same way. Oh wait, I’m a woman though and not supposed to feel this way. I’m supposed to be the one watching one TV show after another, on the phone with my friends at all hours and not interested in sex.

      Passion matters to me a great deal and it’s hurtful when the TV and phone get hubby’s attention more than me. I never say no and put my desires on hold all the time until he feels up to it.
      The other night, a guy my husband works with emailed my husband a picture of rose petals strewn from the front door of his house to the bedroom where they were scattered all over the bed. This guy had done this for his wife for when she got home and my husband actually showed me the picture and thought it was great! I was so hurt and still am, when I wait and wait and wait for some sort of passion to show up and I’m supposed to think this guy getting ready for a night of passion with his wife is so great??

      Sorry that your wife doesn’t show you the passion you desire, but not not all women are this way.
      Amy recently posted…What a joyous day!My Profile

      • @Amy and Nick,

        Funny, I could have written each of your posts. You’re right Amy, it’s not just one sex or the other that experiences this. Sometimes it’s hard for me to believe that a wife can feel this way because my sample size is one, so my experience with my wife is all I know.

        One of my frustrations are she tends to watch sitcoms or dramas with lots of flirting and sexual content. If I want to join her, I end up leaving half the time because I can’t take watching other people getting what I’m missing so much from her. And she has zero interest in shows that I’m into. So I go off and do my own thing (computers and PC games). I’ve tried to include her, but she has no interest in what I do. Not even enough to ask what game I’m playing and what is it about that game that I enjoy. Sometimes we will play a board or card game together, but that’s the exception.

        I’ve tried to share these posts with her in the past, but she tends to not want to read them, and when she does, she feels like I’m accusing her. So now when I read a post that I think would really help her “get” me and maybe open her eyes a little, I no longer share them with her, I just wish to myself and pray to God that she would read them on her own. It just causes problems when I show them to her. At one point she subscribed to Generous Wife and Husband because I asked her to, but she never reads them. I’ve shared with her that it takes me about 1-2 minutes to read them each day and I’d love to be able to discuss them when they are on topics that apply to us, but she usually sighs, says she’ll try, but in the end doesn’t read them. She’s mentioned she’d read them if they could be texted to her, but that’s not an option they offer. They get buried in her inbox and she never gets to them. I shared with her that I just keep a browser tab open to one of them, then click the links to the other ones to read them. She sighs…

        • @closertotheheart,

          This really resonated with me:
          “…she tends to watch sitcoms or dramas with lots of flirting and sexual content. If I want to join her, I end up leaving half the time because I can’t take watching other people getting what I’m missing so much from her.”

          Whenever we are watching a movie or tv show that has a very graphic sex scene and it’s been a while for us, I usually get upset and leave the room. I’ll come back when it’s over, but it hurts soooo much to see something like that when I desire my husband so much.
          That’s why the picture he showed me hurt. There was nothing graphic or wrong with it per se, but I haven’t been able to get it out of my head all week. Just knowing that the husband made that kind of effort to seduce his wife.
          And the next day when my husband was a little later than usual getting home from work I actually had this expectation that maybe he’d stopped to buy me flowers because he knew how upset I’d been. But of course, that isn’t what he did and he just came in like nothing at all had happened the night before. Then I was doubly disappointed, which wasn’t his fault, just that I’d built up this expectation in my mind for how I thought he should respond and when he didn’t I felt even more upset.

          I don’t think it matters which spouse it is, feeling undesired by one’s spouse hurts.
          Amy recently posted…What a joyous day!My Profile

          • Amy, I think that what you wrote would resonate with my wife, though in a different area of life.

            I’m terminal, and it’s getting nasty. She wants to be the right kind of caregiver, and I’m not helping her much. She’s fed to the teeth with my ‘good to go’ and ‘could be worse, at least I’m not slow, soft and ugly’ mantras. I push to do everything I can for myself, even when it goes to the point of collapse.

            So when a good caregiving relationship is shown on television or in film, it does upset her. Part of the upset is directed at me for being a hardheaded fool, but some is turned inward – if she were just a bit better, I would not feel the need to do so much for myself.

            It’s a tough situation, because my bad attitude works for me; it’s kept me more active and alive for longer than my doctor dreamed possible. But on the other hand, something that my wife had previously admired showed a not-so-pretty face, and that’s been hard on her…and on me, because I do genuinely love her with a whole heart.
            Andrew Budek-Schmeisser recently posted…Your Dying Spouse 336 – God’s Lighthouse {FMF}My Profile

          • @Amy, I’m so sorry! You have been so helpful to me. I’m sorry you’re having a tough time.

            I know ALL too well about the movie thing. We’ve not really watched anything graphic, but there was a time my husband kept watching mushy Hallmark movies and I was like (pardon me, but) WTH?!?! It was during the time when he was very distant from me, and it seemed like he was craving romance. At first I thought he was just into the hotter women in the movies and fantasizing about what it would be like to be with them. He always said he loved me, but he NEVER did anything romantic. Just work and sleep, work and sleep. And Hallmark movies. Or football. It was weird and incredibly hurtful.

            I had read that men are good at putting themselves in the place of the man in the movie, the hero, whatever. He actually feels like he’s driving the race car, chasing the bad guy, etc. So I figured my husband was just living vicariously through then men in the Hallmark movies and being romantic in his mind with much better women.

            He obviously didn’t feel I was worth the time or the romance he so desperately wanted with the women in the movie. It made me sad.

            I’m sorry to hear about your husband showing you the picture of the roses. Men can be so dumb! Maybe he thought you’d enjoy seeing it, but as smart as our husbands are, sometimes I think men just don’t think things all the way through. Like “how might my wife react to this?” Men say women are complicated, but sometimes I think if they would just think things through a little bit more, they’d figure a lot more out, and safe us both a lot of heartache!

            • Thanks, B. It was a just a temporary thing, was already having a hard week and although I don’t think he should have showed me the picture, I also allowed myself to make it into a bigger deal than it really was. My hubby is certainly not dumb (not saying that’s what you’re getting at!) he just really has such a big heart for everyone that sometimes he really doesn’t see that something like that hurts me when we don’t have that same dynamic in our marriage the other couple does. Interestingly, my hubby has actually said things about always bugging me in a sexual way or things about always having sex, and I’m like, huh??? Because on my end he never bugs me, although I’d love him too! And having sex once a week is not having sex ALL the time!

              I’m hoping to finally make the time this weekend to sit with him and have a heart to heart. There obviously is miscommunication going on re: sex in our marriage.
              Amy recently posted…Pulling myself up by my bootstrapsMy Profile

              • Hi Amy! I’m sorry, I guess dumb was the wrong word. I don’t think my husband is dumb, either, he’s actually incredibly smart. But is there a word for “incredibly smart but unable to “get” the absolutely most obvious thing in the world”? 😜

                We also have a lot of miscommunication. Like this past week he was being playful and I asked him to stop because I was REALLY in the mood and he’d already said he was exhausted, and his “teasing” was making it harder for me. He seemed hurt when I asked him to stop and I said, “well, it makes it harder for me to relax. I know you can’t understand because you don’t feel the same way about me.” And he acted all hurt and was like “why do you always think I don’t desire you? I desire you so much!” But I’m thinking – HOW can that possibly be? He almost never shows me he desires me, or if he does he almost never acts upon it. He hardly ever initiates sex, he just resigns himself to having sex, and I HATE that.

                Men! They think women are confusing, but men are far, far, far more complicated!

                • I think the word you’re looking for is “oblivious.” It’s the best fit for what you want to say.

      • …BUT…everyone can change and that is the hope that we have in Christ.

        I can remember feeling the same way as both Nick and Amy…absolutely zero passion…deciding that I better learn how to “get used to it”…deciding that I just couldn’t ask again, because I couldn’t take any more rejection…wondering how far I could get if I emptied out the bank account, paid cash for everything, avoided all of the security cameras, just disappeared and found someone new who had some passion.

        But I looked around at all of the second marriages and realized that that was simply too much pain and baggage to create, so I stuck it out…kept praying even though it felt like I was in a vacuum bubble and my prayers were going no where…for years…did what I felt I had to do to keep the family together…worked on myself, and my attitudes, and my responses, and my efforts…and have gotten to the place where…

        …a couple of nights ago, after I thanked her, she responded with…”Thank you, we both needed that!” I have been running on that comment for the last couple of days. Are we perfect, No…do I get everything that I want, No…does she get everything that she wants, No…BUT…”we’ve come a long way baby!”…and we are both getting a lot more of what we want than we used to…and that is so much better than having to deal with the baggage of strained relationships with children, and ex’s….SOOOOO much better. Yes, I regret the years that the locusts have eaten, but we are getting some bumper crops now, baby. :)

          • I’ve seen this clip several times.
            I never know if I should laugh or cry.
            On the one hand, it conveys just how far a man would go to get sex.
            Funny or sad?
            On the other hand, it reaffirms the message I had burned into my brain growing up……”all men want is sex, they will do anything to get sex”.
            Funny or sad?

                • Paul. I don’t think God works as an answer. For instance, let’s take the question of why is water boiling on the stove. Polkinghorne says this is one answer.

                  “the water is boiling because at this temperature it undergoes a phase transition from liquid to vapor.”

                  Well, that’s true. But here’s a better answer.

                  “I want to make some tea.”

                  So why does a man have that strong desire for sex? You can say “God” and that’s a true answer, but if a wife says “Why do you want sex so much?” the husband won’t say, “God.”

                  Nor also would it be the scientific answer of saying something like “I have a great desire to pass my genes on to the next generation and I have a build-up of sperm in me and I gotta have a release.” That could also be true, but it won’t be the answer.

                  For me, I would say to my wife, “Hon. Being intimate with you is the most wonderful physical experience I have ever had. It amazes me so much that there is a woman who actually wants me and wants to have sex with me and I get to treasure your beauty which is the most beautiful sight that I have ever seen. I leave that experience feeling like your man and proud to be your husband and knowing that I am a desired and loved man.”

                  That’s the answer I’d give. Perhaps it would be interesting for others to say why they want sex so much.
                  Nick Peters recently posted…Book Plunge: Seeing Through Christianity Part 4My Profile

                • @Nick Peters – No, “God” is not the answer a man should give his wife. But it would be nice if every woman came into marriage knowing that was, in fact, part of how God made her husband.
                  For me, the bigger question is why do I want sex WITH MY WIFE. The drive is God’s doing; how I use my drive is my doing.
                  Paul Byerly recently posted…Separating Your Real Sexuality From PornMy Profile

              • Nick,
                My guess is that the reason ‘why’ will vary depending on any number of situations going on in a man’s life at a particular point in time.
                The problem is, the number one answer was “Pay for sex” which doesn’t quite correlate with your loving eloquent reasons for wanting sex with your wife.
                If a man truly loves his wife, then why would he have any desire to pay for sex?
                Why would that be the number one answer?

                Sorry, I’ve had so many mixed messages throughout my life regarding male sexuality (this being one of them), my head is spinning.

                Nick, your wife is truly lucky to have you in her life.

                • Jolie. I think the language is clearly hyperbolic. A man is saying “I want sex so much that if this is what it takes, I’m willing to do it!” Naturally, he’s not going to die because he couldn’t enjoy the sex then. Just consider it a way of saying how central this is to a man. It really is. It’s our identity pretty much.

                  We are lucky to have each other. My wife and I both have Aspergers. That makes us a very unique combination together.
                  Nick Peters recently posted…Book Plunge: Seeing Through Christianity Part 4My Profile

                • @Jolie – “The problem is, the number one answer was “Pay for sex””

                  I’d say the question was written to get that answer. If they had asked “Something a husband might do encourag his wife to have sex, “pay” would not have made the top 10. Don’t let Hollywoods intentional skewing tell you something that’s not true.
                  Paul Byerly recently posted…Separating Your Real Sexuality From PornMy Profile

                • I’m more disturbed by the number of men who said they were willing to lie or kill for sex, honesty, than the the ones were merely willing to pay for it. One shouldn’t even joke about stuff like that. And yet, why is it more objectionable to be willing to pay for it? Surely being willing to kill for it is WAY worse, morally.

                  That whole clip was kinda creepy to me, though. Just watching it made me feel ill, it was literally sickening. Wish I hadn’t watched it.

                • @Amazing Ace – It’s an interesting example of how the media can make any group look worse than they are. Skewn the question then off money to get the skewed answers and you can “show” all kinds of things that aren’t true.
                  Paul Byerly recently posted…The Ultimate Selfish Act?My Profile

  2. Funny this exact same thing happened to me. We were in San Francisco a couple of days before our wedding (we had a destination wedding), and DH made a comment about chocolate sauce (and sex). So I went to Ghiredelli’s and got a little bottle of chocolate sauce for the honeymoon. And then I gave it to him, I think either at the rehearsal dinner or after we were married and were settling into the hotel room. And he put it in his suitcase and left it there. Then we got home, and it stayed in its bag in a pile of stuff in our room, and I finally put it in the fridge, and then threw it away 2 years later.

    I don’t understand how DH can bring up sex acts that he 1) actually did with other women and 2) talks about enjoying greatly and then flat out refuses to even try with me. And how he can bring up something, I respond positively, and then he rejects it.

      • I have to admit, I am getting tired of making excuses for him. (I know that’s not what you mean, but it’s how it feels.) So … oooooh, he just felt really free and expressive with 100 other women, but not with me so {fill in the blank} I need to be understanding.

        How about him understanding that at some point, I quit making up excuses for him and accept his actions at face value, and that value is not good? When does it ever come back to me or (even more important) us?

        Considering I have evidence that he was somehow willing to overcome these crippling fears with dozens and dozens of other women, and he has made zero effort with me, how come he gets to cop out with “oh, I’m just afraid of my feelings” and I’m supposed to be okay with that? I’m not okay.

  3. I’m thinking that maybe this issue is the endpoint of a lot of misunderstanding, starting during courtship.

    We want to be appealing and attractive; we want to be the kind of person with whom our beloved would want to spend a lifetime. ANd so we fictionalize ourselves, pretending to be interested in browsing through a craft fair or agreeing to go to the local dirt track for the Saturday night races.

    We sit through endless hours with prospective in-laws, smiling and laughing and secretly hoping someone will pass the hemlock.

    So it’s not really surprising that we learn to keep parts of ourselves hidden until we don’t know that what’s ‘hidden and desired’ is real, or it’s just a conditioned response to the societal norm of what we might be expected to like and want.
    Andrew Budek-Schmeisser recently posted…Your Dying Spouse 336 – God’s Lighthouse {FMF}My Profile

  4. “The first man was “trained” by his family and church before he met his wife, while the second was trained by his wife’s refusal.”

    I contend that, more than likely, the wife’s refusal came from being “trained” by her family and church as well.

    None of us are exempt from the influences of society and culture.

    • I’m the one who made the second quote. Paul’s conclusion that I was trained by my wife’s “refusal” kind of rubbed me wrong, to be honest. If you see my follow-up comment in that other post, I say that my comment about being trained was directed at not pursuing the “gotta have it now” situations (because our situation is one where sex has to be scheduled for multiple reasons). I don’t consider my DW a refuser, she does her best given her circumstances (which no one here knows better than she and I). I am absolutely the high drive spouse, and I would love to be having a lot more sex with my wife, but I also have a ton of compassion and understanding for her circumstances.

        • @Paul – thanks for changing that. “I am closertotheheart, and I approved this message.” :) And no worries, I can see how you would’ve come to that conclusion. Sometimes I get so frustrated that I just want to complain about how unfair my marriage bed is, but usually if I take time to pray before I speak (type), God helps see things in a better light.

  5. I read this article and started feeling suspicious. Is my husband hiding his sexuality from me? Is he holding back? I finally got the gumption to just ask him and we had a great conversation (albeit one-sided…he never asks me about my fantasies, my sexual desires). It is nice to know where he stands, and while it is rather vanilla, he is quite happy with our marriage bed.

    • My husband and I also have discussions, and sometimes long-running jokes, based on Paul’s posts. I was happy to hear he had no desire to smear me up with sticky food items! We had pretty much planned earlier in the day to have an encounter after dinner and several times during (including after he was all finished) I said, ‘Don’t hold back on your secret sexual desires!’ Not sure if it’s common to laugh and joke during sex – it looks so serious in the movies – but we do.

  6. Paul, this post got me thinking. My husband is the most confusing man, ever. I love him, and he says he loves me, and we’ve been together over 20 years – but not once have I believed he finds me sexually attractive, even though he says he does. He has never SHOWN me that he does.

    The thing with the frosting? Lori is so much more mature than me. I would have been hurt, embarrassed, and thrown it out – never to do anything like that again.

    I’m the wife with the higher drive. There is so much I’ve wanted to do sexually that I am afraid will upset him. I don’t even wear lingerie anymore because of something he did a few years ago that made me feel so hideous. Long story short, it was his birthday. I was waiting for him in a piece of lingerie that actually made me feel very pretty. When he saw me, his face fell. He was so disappointed! I was SO embarrassed. I got dressed in my regular clothes, never to wear lingerie again. At the time, it WAS summer, and he HAD been working a lot. Now he tells me he had looked so sad because he was exhausted and knew I was going to be disappointed. But there’s a big part of me that feels I just repulse him and I will not take that chance again. Because really, if he had just SAID something, like “honey, you look beautiful, but it was so hot today and I am so tired. Could you wear that for me again maybe this weekend?” And I would have completely understood. But just staring at me with sadness and disappointment on your face – and saying nothing – sends a horrible message. And to make it worse, I’ve been waiting for years for him to simply say, “I’d love to see you in some pretty lingerie” – and I’d wear it in a heartbeat! But he won’t ask. Because he doesn’t care. So it hangs in my closet. I should just toss it.

    There was also the time I asked him his favorite sexual position and he accidentally mentioned a position he’s never tried with me, but he had once mentioned he enjoyed with his ex. It crushed me! But we talked it through, and he said he thought we had done it, and he absolutely did want to do it with me. I’M STILL WAITING. This even came up a few weeks ago after one of your posts, and I discussed it with him again, and he said he absolutely wants to do it with me. He knows I’ve been longing for him to ask me. But I’m still waiting. And so I assume he doesn’t want to do that. Not with me.

    But after reading your post, I wonder if he is afraid to express his actual desires? I wish he wasn’t. His holding back makes me feel ugly and stupid and worthless. And what is sad is, he could have such a fulfilling sex life if he would just want it! There is so much I would love to do with him if he would just ask, or at least express interest.

  7. The hardest part for me is the fear of being seen as a pervert or selfish. I have sometimes suggested something’s and I haven’t seen her super enthusiastic so I’m afraid she will think I’m a pervert. She asked me today what I wished for my birthday and it was hard but I guess it helped that I had read this because I told her what I wanted. I wanted to spend a whole day with her having fun and also have fun in the bed and try new things. Clothes and other stuff isn’t something I feel that I want, I want her. She didn’t say much but at least said we would spend the day together. She doesn’t withhold sex and things have lately been better but to talk about our desires is still something that really gets awkward. I wanted to say more but I was afraid.
    When it comes to selfishness I’m sometimes afraid for asking for example for a handjob when she isn’t in the mood. I would really feel loved if she would care for that need even when she isn’t in the mood but I don’t think she would like to. I usually give her massages without expecting anything back even when I don’t feel like doing it but te a way to bless her so I sometimes wish she could feel that way about a handjob when she’s not in the mood. It’s just hard to ask her about it.

    • I understand how you feel about asking for something that may seem selfish. I have a very hard time with that, myself. Last night I let hubby know I was horny. He laughed and gave me a kind of “oh well.” I said to him, “if we just had sex for me for 3 days straight and you didn’t get to climax, you’d be chewing the pillows!” He said something defensive, though at that point I had stopped listening, I admit, because he fights dirty and says some pretty nasty things to “win.” My objective was to get him to hear and understand me, not to fight, and not to get hurt.

      As rotten as this sounds, we are doing worlds better than we used to, but it was a big step for me to speak up about my needs.

      In your case, say in 3 months you desire a hand job 9 times. Instead of all or nothing, maybe ask for one once every 3 times. Or once every 9 times…

      Take whatever she gives and thank her for it, sincerely. Unless she is making a huge deal about it and deliberately sabotaging it, then you have bigger problems.

      • Oh I’m glad your situation is better but I really hope it will get even better.
        Thank you for your advice. It’s really hard to share what you want. She is not a hard person to talk to but when it comes to these things it’s really hard. But I will try. Thank you.

        • You’re welcome, and the answer is no. We did not have sex last night so I could receive pleasure. I have to wait until the weekend now, even though we had sex 3 times over the weekend “for him.”

    • @Ads – I understand your concern. I would also bet your wife has no idea and offering you a handjob is not something she thinks about doing. If the pattern is you ask and she answers with yes or no, she figures if you want it you will ask.

      My suggestion would be to discuss it at a nonsexual time. After sex or the day after sex would be good. Tell her you have held back out of concern for what she would think and feel. Tell her making love with her is your first choice, but sometimes when she is not up for that it would be nice if she could use her hand on you. If she’s never done it, offer to show her and help her learn.

      If she seems open to it but does not offer the next few times she says no to sex, ask.
      Paul Byerly recently posted…The Ultimate Selfish Act?My Profile

  8. Dear Paul

    Really good post and discussion! Thank you! I know I’ve bought my wife sexy presents, botched delivery out of shame, and the presents stay in a cupboard or drawer until forgotten. Taught to believe that sexual desires are shameful and ridiculous – and then taught that they are part of our most intimate and personal selves. Some of my sexual desires are sinful and incompatible with being married – but some of them aren’t!

    (ps is this blog on twitter? That’s what I mostly use as a feed)

    David recently posted…1 Peter 3:1-4My Profile

  9. My wife had a 3 year affair. We have our ups and downs trying to work things out. However I’ve for a few years told her how sexually frustrated I was and still am but she just keeps quiet. Needless to say I’ve lost interest in our sex life. She never initiates sex and she’ll do other things than be intimate. She doesn’t want therapy and I even spoke to her mom and sister to help but still no change in her attitude. It’s extremely painful going through this. Any advice.

  10. Such an interesting and intriguing article re men and their sexuality. Real eye opener! I have to admit I spent a lot of time reading the comments.

  11. Pingback: Best Christian Sex Links of the Week – Married Christian Sex

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