Being An Anchor Can Be A Good Thing

I’ve heard men refer to their wife as their anchor. Usually what they mean by this is more along the lines of “ball and chain”.

Being An Anchor Can Be A Good Thing

If your husband has ever complained about you holding him back, I’m sorry. Whatever you did may well have been a case of saving him from himself.

A personal example: The other day I read Lori’s post from two years ago (which I post to twitter and facebook overnight) and it made me kind of sad. In the post, she talked about our RV trip, which we had just started then. I loved that trip, meeting all the new people and seeing so many new places. I loved the coffee shop discussions, the marriage seminars we did, and the remote lakeside parks where we stayed. It was a great nine months. If I had my way, we’d still be out there on the road. 

Of course, we’d more likely be broken down and stuck somewhere. Our RV is no longer up to cross-country travel. Beyond that, I know beyond a doubt we are where we should be right now. But without Lori, I’d risk the potential for breakdowns, and I’m not sure I’d have spent enough time in prayer to hear God saying we needed to be parked for a season. Lori got me to think rationally and listen to God. She was not an anchor keeping me from doing what I wanted; rather she slowed me down enough to get a clear picture of the situation. 

It would be easy to “blame” Lori for not being out there doing what I want to be doing. A lot of guys react this way when their wife is the voice of reason that shows them they need to slow down or change course. And yet, many of these same guys are secretly thankful their wife plays “anchor” from time to time. 

There are exceptions, but this tends to happen along gender lines. God made men and women differently, and when both people do what God made them to do things work out better than they would if one person held back. Be who God created you to be even if you get called an anchor.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and honestly, I’d be okay with being broken down somewhere for a few months – I’d call it an adventure!

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4 Comments on “Being An Anchor Can Be A Good Thing

  1. I struggle with the balance between being submissive scripturally and saying enough to be a helpmeet. I often feel like I’m walking a tightrope trying to get it right but it is not his reaction that causes me to feel this way. He says he appreciates and needs my input. Sometimes I say “I’m thinking you could try this….but you need to hear from God and I’ll pray you hear clearly” other times I’m more “forceful” and then wonder if I said too much. Sometimes I keep my mouth shut and then wonder if I should have “helped”. You’d think as long as we’ve been married, I would have it perfected!

    • @Ann – If she says he wants your input, give it freely. A wise man wants as much information as possible when he makes a decision, and it sounds like you are married to a wise man.
      Paul Byerly recently posted…Be Part of The Solution!My Profile

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