Male Sexuality: Not One-Size-Fits-All

I just published the results of a survey asking men and their wives about how his sexual function has changed with age.

What if fascinating about the results is they show that age is not nearly as big a factor as we might think. Yes, it has an effect, but in many areas, it’s a smaller factor than the differences in men of the same age.

Male Sexuality Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All

Men who could quickly climax again at age 25 still have less downtime than average at 50. The average maximum number of orgasms a man had in one day during the last year was very similar across all ages. Some men are limited to two at 25 and still limited to two at 50. Others could do five at age 25, and still can at age 50. 

Basically, his sexual function is particular to him. It will decline a bit with age, but not significantly unless there are problems. Young men are so sex hungry it’s hard to tell, but by about 25 a man settles into his grove and that’s where he will be from then on.

A few things from the survey you should know.

  1. After he climaxes, continued stimulation may be uncomfortable. About 4% of men said it was painful. About two-thirds of men under the age of 45 find continued stimulation uncomfortable. Several men commented this is less of a problem during intercourse than other sex acts.
  2. Post orgasm erections fade quickly. Two-thirds of men are too soft for intercourse in less than three minutes, and half of those won’t make it past a minute.
  3. Most women say sex is better now than when their hubby was 25. Most women who said it was way worse were age 45-54. (What does that mean?)
  4. He’d really like your help testing his limits. Several men commented their wife would not be up for finding out how many times he could climax in a day.

And, a couple of links to posts that fit this general idea:

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’m’, unique!

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8 Comments on “Male Sexuality: Not One-Size-Fits-All

  1. I’m probably younger than most everyone who commented being under 40, but I can tell you age does make a difference. When I was in college I wanted to see how many times I could get off in a day, I hit 9 and the chafing was too much to continue. I asked my wife to experiment to find out how many times I could still go, she literally laughed at me. When we were dating I would regularly go for three times a night until she would tell me no more. Having been both fat and thin now, I can tell you there is a huge difference in my sex drive when I’m in shape as opposed to when I was fat. At 22 I was attracted to the toaster if you drew cleavage on it, at this point I’ve noticed that it takes a bit more to get my immediate attention. I could still easily have sex 8 or 9 times a week in perpetuity, but my wife hits her limit at more like two, or occasionally three. At this point I can still maintain an erection after orgasm to finish her off.

    I think that we often confuse age related performance issues with “i haven’t taken very good care of myself for ten or twenty years” and assume it is just age causing it, when it very well may be the latter.

    • I’m a woman and there was a time I was masturbating 6 times a day and still feeling unsatisfied. For much of our marriage hubby couldn’t keep up with me. Now, we both more or less have the same drive, although I still masturbate more than he does, partly because I don’t always get to orgasm during sex and partly because he falls asleep easily and I am so wound up from everything I have to remember that I sometimes masturbate to relax and fall asleep.

      I assumed my husband had a drive more like yours. It caused me a lot of angst when it wasn’t. I thought something was wrong with me. He’s just different from a lot of men.

  2. “Most women who said it was way worse were age 45-54. (What does that mean)?

    Peri-menopause/menopause perhaps? A time of change in the biological equilibrium and status quo?

  3. @Paul, I went through a period where I was overtrained, and I had my testosterone checked…..and it was low, like 250 low for a guy in his 30s. After addressing, there is an ENORMOUS difference in my sex drive when testosterone is that low vs when it is 800. I have actually learned to use it as a barometer for when I am overtrained and when I am not. This is why I believe the number of men who are “low desire” compared to their wives is probably just an indicator for ones with low testosterone.

    I would agree with you, and my wife would as well. A few years into our marriage we were talking about how we were as adolescents and she remarked about how she was never super sexual, whereas I was interested in every female that would give me the time of day. That dichotomy pretty much carries forward for twenty years.

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