Don’t Just Shut Up
I had an email from a guy who talked about how his wife had stopped complaining about something and he assumed that meant it was resolved. I suspect most of the women here know this was not what had happened. The issue was unchanged, but the wife had given up because it was clear to her that her husband wasn’t going to change.
I certainly understand getting tired of beating a horse that refuses to move (how’s that for a messed up metaphor?). The problem is men will generally see this as “I win” or “She’s changed her mind”. So just letting it go is the same thing as saying “You were right, I was wrong”. If that’s not what you want to communicate to him, then do something different.
My suggestion would be to drop it after telling him why you’re dropping it. Tell him whatever still bothers you or still seems wrong to you, but it’s clear he isn’t going to change. Explain you’re tired of going round and round about it so you are going to shut up about it. At the very least this lets him know you have not changed your mind. If he’s cleaver it will do more than that.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I made this mistake more than once