What Do You Deserve? Kindness
When I talk about people deserving good things I usually get a lot of pushback from Christians. Some go so far as to say “We deserve to burn in hell, anything better is God’s grace.” I can’t argue with the root truth in that, but it kind of misses the whole God loves us thing. God promises us all kinds of things we don’t deserve in and of ourselves. As I read my Bible I am his son, and sonship comes with all kinds of perks. I “deserve” certain things because I am His.
Beyond that, the Word is full of commands to be loving and kind to others. Jesus said “you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” [Matthew 22:37-40] Clearly Jesus thought it was very important for us to treat each other with kindness and decency. If Jesus thought it was that important, I think it’s fair to say we deserve it.
Of course, we don’t’ always get the treatment Jesus says we should get. But that doesn’t change the fact it’s how we should be treated. On the other hand, we’re never told we can demand to be treated right. But that also doesn’t change how others are supposed to treat us.
Because of bad teaching, many of us have a difficult time thinking we deserve to be treated well, and some are willing to take wrong treatment without saying a word because they have been convinced they don’t deserve any better. Women, in particular, seem to accept this lie which is from the pit of hell!
The problem with this thinking it is that it encourages and excuses bad treatment. We tend to get what we think we deserve, so what we think we deserve really matters.
With that as preamble, I want to do a few posts talking about what I think every wife deserves from her husband. If you aren’t getting any of what I discuss, I’m very sorry. It is my hope that you will see the truth and start to believe your husband should be treating you better. If you stop taking his wrong behaviour without a word, he might change. If you start expecting better he might start doing better. I’m not suggesting you blast him, but it’s right and acceptable for you to let him know you don’t like being treated certain ways.
One thing every one of us deserves from our spouse is kindness. You deserve to be spoken to decently and treated with respect. You deserve that even when your husband has had a bad day and you deserve it even when you’ve been less than perfect. We are to treat everyone with kindness, and that should start at home. If your husband isn’t kind to you he is wrong. Don’t make it easy for him by accepting a lack of kindness as if it’s what you deserve.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I want to be extravagantly kind to my wife!