Having choices is always a good thing, right? And more choices is better than fewer choices, right?
While both of those are true in many situations, having to make too many decisions can be a problem. Studies have found folks suffering from burnout find it difficult to make decisions, and for those close to burnout facing new decisions can push them over the line.
As great as it is to have choices, every decision takes mental energy. If there are a lot of decisions the sum of the energy needed can exceed what we have available.
If your husband works a job that demands him to make many decisions, he may come home decisioned out. If he won’t make choices, or says “whatever you want” or just refuses to answer when you ask him to make a choice, he might be suffering from “decision burnout.”
If he has too many decisions in his life, giving him more is only making it worse. If you can do some things without his input, doing so might be a loving act. When you need his input try to phrase it so there is an easy answer for him. So rather than asking him where he wants to go to eat, or giving him a choice of several places, ask him if he wants to go to Joe’s Crabshack. He is free to make another suggestion, but he can take the easy way out and say yes if he needs to.
This won’t apply to some men, and some would feel manipulated. But if he is decisioned out this could be a real kindness.
~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’ve never been without an opinion.
For the record, I coined the term decision burnout for this post. Then I Googled it and got 245 hits!