I can only imagine how some men will react to my title. Oh, well.

In most marriages the sex life just sort of happens. There’s no real discussion, it just evolves. And because most newlywed men are far more into sex than most newlywed women, it tends to develop based primarily on his interest and desires. At most, the wife has a veto, which is hardly a way for her to help shape the couple’s sex life.

Perhaps this is why so many wives have so little interest in sex. Even if they have, or once had, a desire for sex, what actually happens in bed has little to do with what she wants. Sex has become all about satisfying him. If she enjoys it along the way that’s nice, if not maybe next time. Or not.

Now that you’ve been having sex for a while, you should have a better idea of what you want. You know what kinds of touch you like and which you don’t. You know what positions feel good and which ones do nothing for you. You know when during the day and the month you most want and can most enjoy sex.

So why not sit down with your husband and discuss how a mutually enjoyed sex life might look? 

I would think the 1 Cor 7 admonition to provide for each other sexually would need to be a baseline, but I think that scripture means far more than “You can’t say no.” If you want to climax, then 1 Cor 7 says he needs to make sure that happens. If you’re never going to enjoy morning sex, then 1 Cor 7 means it should occur only rarely. 

God intended you to want and enjoy sex every bit as much as your husband. Anything else is falling short of God’s plan, and that’s a problem.

By The Way: If you’re still trying to figure out sex for you, I very highly recommend the book Awaken Love. You can read Lori’s review of the book here.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’m glad my wife enjoys sex!

Image Credit: © auremar | stock.adobe.com
Shop Amazon ♦ Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, see my disclosure for info.