Men tend to treat their sex drive much the way they treat hunger in that they are quick to grab a snack rather than waiting for a full meal. When I say snack here, I mean masturbating.

I think men are more given to this for a couple of reasons. Men have less anti-sex pressure, which makes it easier. They have a stronger sex drive, especially as teens, which pushes them to do it. It’s also a lot easier for a man to have a quick masturbatory orgasm. We can easily do it standing and we can easily do it in less than a minute. As desperately horny teens a quick snack is a fairly common thing. And that can become a habit that sticks into marriage.

I’ve explained the why here without making any judgment. Some women will see this as sin. Others will see it as wrong if the wife is willing. And some see it as “At least he’s not bothering me.”

I tell men their sexuality should be in their wife’s hands and snacks are a usually bad idea. Among other things, it might spoil their appetite for the big meal they could have later! That said, a lot of guys are going to snack if they find themselves hungry. He’s been doing it since long before he met his wife and it’s just how it is.

If a wife wants to reduce between-meal snacking, what can she do? She needs to learn to understand his hunger so she can feed him or promise him a meal before he goes for a snack. He likes what she feeds him way better than what he does himself and once he knows she’s going to provide he will lose interest in snacks.

So:

• If it’s been too long when you wake up, let him know you have a really great sexual meal planned for that night.
• Offer him snacks when you think he’s hungry and there is no meal planned. With a bit of practice you can learn to give him a snack he will love in ten minutes.
• Ask him to let you know when he feels like a snack. Then you can say, “Let me” or “Enjoy it” or “Can I watch” or “Can you wait a few hours for a solid meal?”

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I have no interest in snacking these days!

Image by Ana_J from Pixabay
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