This being Black Friday, I don’t know how many of you will see this. So I’m going to post a slightly modified version of something I posted on Quora.

The original question was about how a woman could get her husband to climax by hand. I’ve heard this from other women – he enjoys it, but it takes forever to get him to come.

I’ve talked about handjobs a few times here. It’s probably on the bottom of most men’s list for sex with their wife, but done well it can be very good. And it is, or should be, easy for the wife.

You want to stimulate his penis, his mind, and his eyes. But first a word about attitude. If you come across as “I’m doing this to shut you up and it better not take long” the result for him will be barely better than if he did it himself. On the other hand, if your goal is to love and bless him and make him feel really good, he will enjoy it much more.

• HIS EYES: Nudity is always good. So is wearing something sexy. He should be able to see your breasts during the handjob, You can start topless or uncover them as you’re working on him. Letting him see you playing with a nipple will turn him on. You can ask him to touch your breasts or just pick up his hand and put it there.
  You can also encourage him to look at what you’re doing to his penis. This gets some guys going, others not so much.
• HIS MIND: Talk about how big and hard his penis is. But don’t say penis. Most guys get turned on hearing their wife use certain words. Find his words and use them. Tell him you like how he feels in your hand and that you love watching him squirt. Comment on his growing arousal and how he will soon feel really good. Don’t give him a constant stream of words, but say something here and there to keep his mind going.
  Telling him a sexual fantasy about the two of you might be good. Some guys really get into that, some find it distracting. Another option is to give him a scenario to fantasise about. For example, you could say. “We go somewhere on vacation but get snowed in. We have the whole weekend in a nice suite and we decide to see how much sex we can have. Now imagine what happens.”
• HIS PENIS: Use lube, and plenty of it. This makes what you do feel better, and it allows you to stimulate him more strongly without making him sore. Baby oil will work or buy a lube made for sex.
  His penis is not as delicate as you think. Most women don’t use enough force when they do a handjob. You probably need to squeeze harder and move faster. Start slow, then pick it up.
  Focus on the head. You can make him feel good touching the shaft and his balls, but that will never make him come. The edge of the head near the shaft is very sensitive and the tag of skin on the underside where the head and the shaft meet is very sensitive.
  Use a bit of mouth. Some guys find it difficult to orgasm from oral and some women don’t want to finish a man in their mouth. Still, the sight of your mouth on his penis is a huge turn-on. Use that early on to get him horny.
  If he’s not circumcised, pull the foreskin back all the way and hold it down with your non-dominate hand. If he is circumcised, do the same thing to make the skin taught. This increases the sensation.
  When he is close, finish him off like this: Make sure he is good and lubed. Use your off-hand at the base of his penis to make the skin tight. Form a ring with the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand and slide that up the shaft till it hits the head. Slide down and repeat. Use a firm grip going up and loosen it a bit going down. Make short strokes so you hit the head often. Don’t hold back, pull fast and hard!

For a more detailed post on handjobs, check out How To Give A Handjob | The XY Code

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I hope you survive Black Friday!

Image Credit: © karabanov84 | stock.adobe.com
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