More things your husband may have heard about sex – probably when you weren’t around. Last time was the teen years. Today as an adult.

Women use sex to control men

Of course, this is true of some women. But men see sex being used as a way to control them when that is not what the woman is doing. 

I know she enjoys sex because she always has an orgasm…

I could show you a dozen comments that start this way on The Generous Husband, and I’ve heard it a few times in real life too. Men think an orgasm means you wanted and enjoyed the sex, and they tell each other this is true. And this feeds the one above. If her orgasm proves she enjoys it, then saying no must be about controlling or manipulating.

She uses sex as a reward

Again, some women do this. And again, men tend to see it when that’s not what she is doing. This one also feeds the idea she is using sex as control.

PMS and Periods are used as an excuse to avoid sex

Some men don’t think these issues could in any way make a woman less interested in sex, or make sex uncomfortable.

If she loved me, she’d say yes more often

Men can’t figure out why a woman who claims to love them would deny them sex most of the time they want it. The only logical explanation is that she doesn’t really love him.

Oral sex (or something else) stopped when we got married

Sadly this one is all too true when it’s said, and it’s said far too often. Men see this is proof she used sex to get married. The other form of this is “Sex slowed down on the honeymoon” and it’s all seen as proof she was using sex to get married. I realise there are other reasons for these changes, but you’ve got to admit from his viewpoint it doesn’t look good.

Even if your guy hasn’t heard these, the odds are he has thought some of them. From the male standpoint, these things seem to be the only explanation for what you say or do. Or don’t say or don’t do. If you think any of these is in play in hubbies head, look for a way to address it.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and maybe we should just as our wife what she thinks and feels.

Image Credit: © Monkey Business | stock.adobe.com
Shop Amazon ♦ Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, see my disclosure for info.