You may think your husband is horny 24/7/365. Odds are he is not. And even if he is, that doesn’t mean his sex drive is constant or is predicted by obvious things like how much sex he’s had recently. Yes, less sex means more drive, but it’s not always a simple cause and effect thing.

There are times his drive is unusually high, and he has no idea why. There are other times his drive is running lower than usual, and again, he has no idea why. Some days he’s just really horny, and even after having great sex he could do it again rather soon, and would probably ask if he felt it was safe to do so.

I’ve seen this in myself for 36 years of marriage, and I can’t explain it. Sometimes I can point to something as the cause of a stronger or weaker than usual drive. Other times it feels like a roll of the dice. I do know that feeling close emotionally will bump my drive. I also know that unusually good sex can leave me more aroused the next day or later that day. But other times, I have no idea.

I bring this up to tell you that you shouldn’t read too much into variations in his drive. A sudden increase doesn’t mean he’s looking at porn and a sudden dip doesn’t mean he’s masturbating or having an affair.  A young man may be so horny you can’t see these variations, but with age, the ups and downs will become more noticeable.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and sometimes I have no clue.

A post worth reading:

The Generous Husband | Meet One Of My Heroes ◄ A two-year-old post I did explaining why my wife is one of my heroes!

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