Given all the sad things shared in recent comments about unbiblical things taught about women and sex, I just had to say:

GOD WANTS WOMEN TO ENJOY SEX!!!

The Bible is very clear about this. In 1 Cor 7, there is no gender difference; he owes her sex just like she owes him sex, and that would have to mean good, enjoyable sex. In 1 Timothy 5:9-12 Paul says that widows under 60 should not be put on the list because they will get horny and remarry. (Okay, that’s my words, but that is what it says!) In Genesis 3:16 God said that even though childbirth would hurt, a woman would sexually desire her husband. (See here for some details on that.)

If a woman does not enjoy sex, something is wrong. And if her husband is not distraught about her not enjoying sex, he’s not being a good, loving husband. That said, most of the men I talk to care a great deal about their wives enjoying sex. I know there are exceptions, but they are just that. I know plenty of couples where he is far more concerned with her lack of sexual enjoyment than she is. That, of course, goes back to all the garbage women have been taught about sex rather than hearing the good news that they should be loving it.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I pray sex gets better for every one of you!

A book worth reading:

Along these lines, I have been reading the brand new Married Sex: A Christian Couple’s Guide to Reimagining Your Love Life by Gary Thomas and Debra K. Fileta. This book says all the things some of you have been saying need to be said, and stands against what you have been saying is wrong. In the first chapter, Gary says “The Song [of Songs]  says sex isn’t just for the husband or even primarily for the husband. The first person to be pleased is the wife. The Bible celebrates and sanctifies the pleasure women get from sex.” In the next chapter, Debra addresses pain from sex and makes it clear this is not acceptable or to be endured.

I’ll do a full review on TGH when I finish and link to it from here. But based on what I have read and peeking ahead some, this is an exceptional book that proclaims God’s truth about sex and deals with the many lies in a gracious and loving way. 

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