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Earlier this week, I suggested to the men on The Generous Husband that they have a discussion with their wife about how each of them shows love to the other. I got this idea after reading chapter six of Timothy Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God. In explaining ways we show love, Keller related how a dirty diaper taught him that he expected his wife to show him love by not asking him to change diapers. But his wife expected him to show her love by changing diapers.

Over all, it was a great chapter. However, I was frustrated that there was no mention of sex as a way to show love. Granted there is a chapter, on sex, but if diapers can show love, it seems sex should get a few words.

Most men have thought, if not said, if she really loved me, we would have more sex. If a man feels that way, NOTHING else his wife does to show him love is going to make him feel loved.

I realise some of you are sick to death of hearing about sex. I’m sorry about that. But it really is that big a deal for most men. It’s NOT the only thing they care about, it’s just big enough to make the rest unimportant if it’s being ignored.

Have you ever felt your husband didn’t really love you, or didn’t love you enough to do what you needed? How did that make you feel about him? How did it affect the way you treat him? He’s no different.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and making love is expressing love.

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