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I’ve been talking both here and over on TGH about the things our spouse does to show love, and what makes us feel loved. Some of that is the big stuff. The things that really matter to us, or things that cost our spouse something. But don’t overlook the power of the small stuff. A trickle of that is nice. A river is good. A flood of it is awesome!

Some small stuff is as simple as common courtesy. Saying please and thank you, or picking up his coffee cup from the side table. Kind words and small loving gestures are also a part of this. Little gifts, holding his hand, and asking about his day all qualify as well.

When a couple is first together, this kind of stuff is so natural, it happens all the time without thought or effort. But as a marriage progresses, these things usually become less common. Not because we care less, but because we become used to each other.

If is you realise this has happened to you, may I suggest you start being intentional about doing all those things? It really costs you very little, and the effect can be great. It won’t solve or end big problems, but it can change how you feel about each other, and that will make dealing with the big stuff so much easier.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and small things can be huge!

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