Podcast: Download

I want to finish our discussion of porn by talking about why we use it. I say we because it’s not just a guy problem any more. Studies find about 60% of US women willing view porn each month. Studies of Christian women put it at 30%. And both numbers are far larger for younger women.

Porn is not about sex. Porn uses sex. It’s like over eating. No one is obese because of their legitimate hunger. Over eating is done because it makes us feel good. It’s a way of medicating our pain. Porn is the same way, the arousal it causes medicates our pain. As we usually pair porn with masturbation or sex, that makes it even more powerful.

Your husband, doesn’t look at porn because you say no to sex, or because you won’t do anal. He might us porn to medicate the pain he feels from those things, but he could also binge on Ben & Jerry’s, get drunk, or game for hours.

His porn use is not about you. Let me say that again, His porn use is not about you! He may blame it on you to feel better about himself, or to manipulate you. He might even believe his own lies. But it is a lie; a lie you should reject. He turns to porn when reality is too difficult.

BTW, porn addiction is not a real thing. I’m discussing this over on The Generous Husband today.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I’m far more tempted by ice cream than porn!

Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with Flux Dev
Shop Amazon ♦ Shop to give links page
We’re donation supported Thanks for your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, see my disclosure for info.