Competing with electronic gadgets came up several times in the What Husbands Want Their Wives to Know survey. Be it television, social media, or Candy Crush, men do not like being second to something with an off-button!

Is this a valid concern, or are men just being unreasonable? Some men can be demanding about attention, but there is a real problem here for many. For years, relationship experts have been warning smartphones can hurt marriages, and now studies support this. One study found just having a cell phone in sight during a conversation resulted in reports of lower relationship quality and feeling less close. Imagine how much worse things are when phones are used during time together!

Is your husband starting to see your phone or computer as “the other man”? Does he wonder if you would pick your phone over him if forced to decide? Might you be among the 57% of US women said they would choose a week without sex over a week without their smartphone?

Because women are more social than men are, I suspect “social-media addiction” is more common for women. This probably also means male tolerance for heavy use is lower. 

A few suggestions:

• Put your phone out of sight during meals, and don’t answer if it rings. Even better, silence it.
• Likewise, when you want to have a discussion or some non-sexual touch.
• Consider making the bedroom a no connected devices area. Or, agree they get put up and ignored at a certain time each evening.
• Getting on your phone shortly after sex is insulting your hubby.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and no one wants to be phubbed!

 Resource Links:

• How Your Cell Phone Hurts Your Relationships – Scientific American
• Social Media Study Finds Link Between Media Use And Relationship Satisfaction – HuffPost
• 57% Of American Women Choose Smartphone Over Sex – Medical Daily 
• Your smartphone may be powering down your relationship – CNN health

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