Over on Quora, a fellow said his wife never initiates sex and he wanted to know how to change that. The suggestions included:

• “Look for a new wife. You should not have to beg for sex.”
• “You may not be satisfying her sexual needs.”
• “You either become an active part in the female-led relationship or you cash out now.”

I’m guessing most of those men are projecting their marriage on the question. The question said nothing about begging or the wife being unwilling or unsatisfied, but many of the answers assumed one or more of those things.

Most men have no understanding of responsive desire, so when they’re faced with a woman who won’t ask for sex they choose to make up answers. And that, of course, can go very wrong and get rather ugly.

Of course, it’s not just men who do this. Women do the same with male behaviour they don’t understand.

~ Paul – I’m XY, and I don’t think getting it wrong with gusto makes it any better!

A post worth reading:

Dr. Corey | Desire for admiration◄ We all have it.

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