Okay, I admit I’ve never been as limited by what others think as many folks. But as I get older (today I’m 60!) I find it easier to be my own quirky self.

Around here we celebrate birthdays on the nearest family night – which happens every Saturday. I asked everyone to bring a food they really like and said I was making the cake. I treated them to a Byerly family tradition I had not yet shared: spice cake with blue peppermint frosting. I don’t know if anyone else thought it was fantastic, but I enjoyed it and we all had a great time.

It’s a shame we spend so much time and effort trying to control who people are and how they act. I know a lot of husbands who do or don’t do certain things in front of their wife because she gets all embarrassed by him being who he wants to be. My wife long ago decided “You’re an adult, and I’m not responsible for you.” That may have been about preserving her sanity, but it was also a wonderful gift. 

Is there anything you try to keep your husband from doing because it makes you feel embarrassed? Is it really such a big deal? Might both of you be happier if you decide he’s an adult and you’re not responsible for him?

~ Paul – I’m XY, and sixty is looking good!

A post worth reading:

PsyPost | When turning down a partner’s sexual advances, reassuring behaviors are key, study finds ◄ How you say no matters.

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